Scraping The Barrel Movie Reviews

I am scraping the bottom of the barrel from a movie perspective. At this point, any movie that seems the least bit interesting is getting a shot. What else am I going to do? These are trying times for people who want/need to spend a lot of time watching stuff. Recently, I watched four movies because I lacked anything better to do. Here, in ascending order, are my brief reviews.

A Simple Favor is terrible. I was intrigued about the idea of a thriller starring Anna Kendrick and Blake Lively, but I was weird out by it being directed by Paul Feig. In truth, I’m not a big Feig fan, and this is not the genre he usually works it. Turns out I was write. This movie is just so bad. Kendrick is good in it, but the movie is so over the top and feels clumsy. Feig is out of his depth. I turned it off and read the synopsis. I was so glad I did, because it apparently gets even dumber. Total flop.

I like the first Hellboy. The one with Ron Perlman. It’s totally fine. The new Hellboy with David Harbour is not good, even though I like Harbour better than Perlman as an actor. I also turned this one off. I wasn’t annoyed like with A Simple Favor. I was just bored. While watching a movie about a demon guy and a lady who has been cut into a bunch of pieces but is still alive and also a weird pigman that creeped me out. I had heard this was not a good movie. Those reviews were correct.

Hotel Artemis is totally fine. It seemed to be based on the desire to turn the assassin hotel from John Wick into a full movie. It has quite the cast. Jodie Foster and Sterling K. Brown carry the bulk of the film. Jeff Goldblum has a brief role but is largely wasted. Charlie Day has a fun role as a jerk. Hotel Artemis has some good qualities, but it also has some bland aspects to it. Overall, it’s good enough to be worth watching once.

Lastly, we have the best movie of the bunch, the all killer, no filler Crawl. It’s not even 90 minutes long and it’s the perfect length. Crawl is a horror movie with a simple premise. There’s a hurricane down in Florida. A college girl goes to check in on her dad. He’s stuck down in the crawlspace beneath their old house. Now it’s pouring rain and there are hungry gators. That’s it. That’s the movie. It’s a lean, mean monster movie machine, but not a crazy one. The monsters are just gators. Crawl know what it wants to be, and if that sounds good for you this is definitely a movie to check out.

About Chris Morgan

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