In the parent-child connection or relation, children always feel emotionally safe, but only if they observe a strong relationship with their parents. If children know that they held in very high esteem. Kids only express their emotions and share all of their thoughts when they feel safe and also by knowing that you are not going to judge them
Here are some tips for emotional safety of your foster child:
- Love your child as is
Author William Martin said, “You do not have to make your kid into a wonderful person. You have to remind your kid that he/she is already a wonderful person by heart. Moreover, if you do this constantly from the very first day when they are born then they believe it easily”.
Loving your children as is means creating a sense of safety.
- Let them know that they always count on you.
- Tell them that, your world would not be the same if he were not in it
- Tell your child that he/she means the world to you. And give them opportunities to feel good about themselves.
- Validate their emotions
Emotions are the things that made us humans. We all know that emotional safety comes from our hearts. So, it would help if you taught your child to be comfortable with their feelings and emotions; dismissing their feelings will make the situation more uncomfortable in the present or future as well. Or worse, it may lead them to feel fear or be ashamed of their emotion by developing secondary feelings.
Create some opportunities that your kid will be able to deal with kind of emotional selves. It is also essential to make them feel like their emotions are valid. So, by this, they are more likely to react in a very good or appropriate manner in any crisis.
For instance, if you tell your kid that you know and understand the feeling of disappointment for not getting anything that he/she wants. In this way, you are not just helping him by putting a name to his senses, but you are making a connection with their emotions and mind as well.
- Remember to address your own emotional needs
An expressively distant parent will lead you to have an emotionally distant kid. That will share all of his feelings without any fear or offense. One of the best ways to support your kids and make them learn about attitudes and develop an expressively safe relationship is to deal with our own emotions first, as moms.
Also, keep in mind that our past frustrations, feelings of anger, and shame could also be able to stir up the fears that may affect how we are parenting.
For example, do not ever hide your irritation, annoyance, or anger from your child. But, also remember that our child is watching us determine; how to react to their emotions. Saying a sentence like, “I am going to take five minutes to calm my mind before we discuss stuff,” it shows your kid that anyone can experience anger or anything else, but this can be handled correctly.