Hi Lostchild, welcome to VENTS! How have you been?
Hey guys, I’ve been keeping busy! It’s been a lot of work this year, and there have been setbacks, and a lot of self-doubt, but I’ve just been ploughing ahead!
Can you talk to us more about your latest single “Blacklist”?
It’s about desperately changing yourself to impress someone who isn’t into you. I think it’s a fairly common mind-set that we’re always into attractive people who ignore us, even more so in my experience as an insecure gay man.
Did any event in particular inspired you to write this song?
There was a guy. We had this really intense chemistry but he made it clear he wanted it to be as casual as casual can be. After a couple of amazing…let’s call them encounters, he seemed to lose interest, so I jumped through hoops to arrange meeting up with him, and was entirely focused on pleasing him when we did. But I had such an attraction to him that it was just a thrill to be around him. It wasn’t healthy but it was exciting.
How was the filming process and experience behind the video?
In the video for “Blacklist” I wanted to portray myself as desperate to please, and the strain it takes on me. I got drunk, I smoked, I danced around for the camera, I wore incredibly revealing clothing, and wrecked that hotel room. Gary Woods, the video director didn’t take the camera off me once, even when I was struggling to put clothing on, or I was feeling self-conscious, and I hope people watch the video and think that I look a little desperate, a little pathetic, because that’s honestly how I feel when I look back on all the times I’ve felt the need to impress and be noticed for validation. Gary did a wonderful job of delivering the poignant message behind the chaos, and I love the seedy but strangely melancholic feel that the video has.
Why naming the EP after this track in particular?
It’s the first single! But also, I guess because I have this warped view of how people see me. I have this incessant desire to be liked by people, that gives me such bad anxiety, and I always feel like an outsider because of it. I always feel like everyone else has got it right, and I’ve been blacklisted.
How was the recording and writing process?
All the songs wrote themselves pretty much, I’d say each one was written in a day or less. That’s generally how I work. Once I get in the zone with something, the whole thing pours out. John at Dusted Productions helped with the recording and mixing, and that takes a load off. He’s a tech wiz, and a great producer and mixing engineer.
What role does Banbury play in your music?
It’s where I grew up, and the place that kind of shaped my view of myself, for better or worse. Anyone who grows up gay in a small town knows that there’s nothing there for them from a pretty young age, and yet you’re trapped. I felt nothing in common with everyone, and began to feel like that’s just what life was like, and I don’t think we ever quite get over that mind-set. That was when I started writing music.
What is it about the 70s and 80s that you find so fascinating?
I’d say it’s more the 80s and 90s, and my mother accidentally introducing me to Madonna is mainly responsible for this. The sounds of The Immaculate Collection were some of the first musical sounds I heard, and I guess it stuck. I think I like the funkiness and the drama of it all too. I like music that’s always trying to grab my attention and the 80s especially had some OCD pop music.
What aspect of your own personal struggles and life did you get to explore on this record?
I’ve made a lot of bad decisions whilst under the influence of alcohol and drugs. I’ve had sex or given time to the wrong people, let down the right ones, and feel this crushing guilt all the time. The four songs on the EP both celebrate these bad decisions and also touch on the guilt. I see myself at my lowest on this EP, but also see flecks of hope that all these personal struggles could soon be mostly in the past.
Any plans to hit the road?
Of course, gigging is my favourite thing to do, but you can follow me everywhere @lostchliduk to be the first to know when my next show is!
What else is happening next in Lostchild’s world?
Right now, I want to get the songs on “Blacklist” out there as much as possible, gig wherever I can, and then sit down and write. Write and write and write. Write and gig and write and gig. I still have so much more to say.